snorlaxatives: the first person to ever fall asleep was probably like “aw fuck i’m dying” but then woke up hours later and was like “aw yeah that’s the shit i do like” one of the greatest texts posts I’ve ever seen.
genuinelylarry: what if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure out what they meant for ourselves
You can run from your demons until you are exhausted… one day you will have to...– That Handsome Devil (via satanpanties)
best-of-funny: lets-go-lesbos: people who say all water tastes the same are full of shit. X Stater Water is the best. Arrowhead is shit.
I love that feeling when your so happy it feels like your chest is going to explode.
jdomenic: maybe your dick is so small because you took 3/4 of it and shoved it into your personality
Any guy can have a kid, it takes a special kind of person to be Dad.